Will you be my Xmas cracker? I'd really like to pull you.

Will you be my Xmas cracker? I'd really like to pull you.

Why'd they call it PMS? Cos Mad cow disease was already taken!

Why don't you come over here, sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up?

Why don't you come over here, sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up?

Where there's a will, I want to be in it

When ur lonely and upset, just turn to the mirror and say, "shit, im so cute." Then u'll feel fine... But dont make it a habit, cause liars go to hell!

When I'm older, I'll look back at all of my crowning memories, and think of the day my children were born, the day I got married, and the day that I met you.

When all else fails manipulate the data

What's a nice girl like you doing with a face like that?

What's a nice girl like you doing with a face like that?

What time do you have to be back in heaven?

What time do you have to be back in heaven?

What did the bartender say to the jumper cables when they walked into the bar? Ok u 2, don't start anything.

What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse.'