- What is the difference between Mother & Wife?

- One woman brings U into this world crying…

And the other ensures U continue to do so.

Ghungat may jo dekha toh deewana hua,
Mastana huaa,sangeet ka tarana huaa,
Jaisy he ghungat uthaya iss duniya say ravana huaa.

Maine puchha chand se “dekha hai kahin mere yaar sa hasin”

Chand ne kaha “saale itni uppar se kuch dikhta hai kya?”.

Father to son after exam : Let me see your report card.

Son : My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents.

Terrorists have kidnapped our lecturers,
And demanded of 500000 rs or else,
They will burn them with kerosene,
Plz donate.
I have donated 15 litres.

Once God came up 2 me & granted me a wish.
I asked 4 “world peace”.
“That’s impossible”, he said.
Then I asked him 2 give U brain.
He said “Let me try world peace”

Radhey radhey,kudi fasadey
Hare murari,miley kuvari
Jai hanuman,pat ja meri jaan
Wahe guru da khalsa,ek soni kudi di lalsa.

Boy : Janeman! tute huye dil se pyaar karogi ya dil tutne tak pyaar karogi.

Girl : Harmkhor! tuti huyi chappal se pitega ya chappal tutne tak pitega.

Wife : Kaash main newspaper hoti dinbhar tumhare hathon main rehti.

Husband : Meri bhi yahi dua hai rab se issi bahane har din nayi nayi to milti.

- It’s funny when people discuss Love Marriage Vs Arranged Marriage.

- It’s like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered.

- Why do Gods stay up in heaven?

- Because they are afraid of what they have created!

Wife : Kya kar rahe ho?
Man : Makkhiya maar rha hu.

Wife : Kitni mari?
Man : 3 male aur 2 female.

Wife : Kaise malum?
Man : Kyonki 3 daru ki botal se chipki thi or 2 phone se…

Human brain is the most outstanding object in world.
It functions 24 hrs a day, 365 days a year.
It functions right from the time we are born,
And stop only when we enter the examination hall.

Husband aur wife hotel mein gaye tabhi 1 lady ne Hello kiya,

Wife : Koun thi wo?
Husband : Tum dimag kharab mat karo, main pehle hi pareshan hu ki woh bhi yehi puchegi.

Circuit : Aye Mamu, tereko papad aur jhapad mein pharak pata hai kya?
Mamu : Nehin.
Circuit : To kha ke dekh Le, pata chal jayega.